Here’s to a cup of kindness each and every night. May your New Year be filled with kindness; let it lead the way in all that you do.
Just think, what a fabulous way to role model for our children just what we want more of.
A cup of kindness known as:
~ Self-care! Be kind to yourself by focusing first on YOU so you can parent well…patiently…with a sense of humor…
Really. Taking care of YOU is essential for…well…EVERY thing.
~ Calm connection! Especially with your child and ESPECIALLY when they are anything but calm…(A rather large mug-full of self-care kindness required at these times )
~ BIG-GIANT feelings of our kids’ greeted with open arms and the message that “your feelings matter…you can count on me to keep it together no matter how BIG your feelings are!” What a feeling of safety for our kids as they work through the tumultuous-ness of all things upsetting.
~ Pausing! Then asking our child, “What do you suppose would be the kind thing to do right now?” And relishing your child’s ideas…
~ Calm and consistent follow through with the choice your child makes–whether it is for a positive thing or something less than peaceful as you move forward with your promise of no family game until homework is done. Calm and consistent follow through demonstrates guidance that is kind AND respectful. Just what our children can learn well from.
~ Letting go! Perhaps of OUR agenda…or solution…or desire to have it all feel easy and calm and smooth, or that seemingly essential errand, or going ahead with that essential errand and being okay with your child reaching their limit of patience. Another BIG mug full of kindness known as self-care required for this one…
~ SHOWING our children what care and compassion can do for another…showing and letting go of their participation. Our role-modeling–no matter what they decide to do–is one of the greatest ways to influence our kids in positive and powerful ways.
~ Presence! Intentionally choosing to be fully present to whomever you are with–whether it is engaging in conversation and play, or quietly watching your child as they immerse themselves in a game, or sitting through the alligator tears of hurt feelings. What a simple way to show kindness to another–our full, un-distracted presence. And that includes our presence to our SELVES…
A few ways to have a cup of kindness–go share one with
your child (or yourself) today and know that it will ripple out in lovely ways to all over time. What we focus on grows…
Happy 2019!
Alice
Author and Parent Coach
©2018 Alice Hanscam