How might your resilience benefit far beyond yourself?
All that we do impacts and influences others. We have a responsibility in this world to take care with what and how we do things.
That can feel like a load, can’t it? And yet…I find that can be freeing and inspiring and energizing. For me, it takes my focus from “woe is me” to a more optimistic approach to any challenge that comes my way. How I choose to navigate a challenge has the power to impact far beyond me. And this matters. So I keep on trying.
What does this require? The recognition that resilience is way less about always being able to handle the hard, and way MORE about allowing and even embracing the natural ups and downs of life. The hard, the sad, the grieving…along with the ease, the positive, the joy. Sometimes they take turns. Sometimes they are part of each day.
For me, in the midst of a loved one’s cancer journey, that means each day can be a combination of tears, laughter, checking out for a bit, intentionally creating bits of self-care. It means recognizing I’m feeling down and sad, even angry…and allowing myself to feel that way rather than work hard at changing it. Rather a paradox, you know, when instead of trying hard to “feel better” you just FEEL…and then feeling better emerges.
Every. Single. Time. (and yes, maybe it takes a long time…)
This kind of resilience is about sharing. Reaching out to the helpers. Being a helper when you can (I so love Mister Rogers! His words always inspire). Knowing that we are all connected and what each of us thinks, feels, and does matters. This kind of resilience supports us as we struggle; lifts us as we take action; connects us deeply.
Strengthening our resilient selves requires awareness of what works for us, what we can do differently or more of. Taking self-care to new and different levels. Allowing others to care for us. Doing caring things FOR others. Recognizing how shared this journey is for each of us–the struggle I’m in is universal. We all struggle. And we all can be a part of what supports each of us to ultimately live well.
How does my resilience benefit others? I hope it is empowering. I hope it has others close to me increasing their awareness of their own inner strength, their own ability to be resilient. I hope it has those in my life tuning within and discovering what they need for themselves, what works for them to navigate the hard.
Mostly, I hope and intend for a better world for our children, grandchildren, and beyond. A world in which we strengthen our ability to PAUSE, to respond to any of the difficulties with calm, clear intention, allowing for real, positive, meaningful change to occur.
“Through the hard comes real and meaningful connection.Respect. Appreciation and gratitude. Love. Kindness. Growth. Rarely easy. Often messy. Downright scary at times. Loss is a part of this. Compassion comes from it.” (Alice Hanscam)
Resilience.
You may enjoy this piece of mine: “How We See the World IS Our Responsibility”
Or this: “Our Response Matters”
With JOY,
Alice
Author
www.denaliparentcoaching.com